Mountain Views News, Sierra Madre Edition [Pasadena] Saturday, February 16, 2019

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BUSINESS NEWS & TRENDS

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Mountain Views-News Saturday, February 16, 2019 

Jeff’s Book Pics By Jeff Brown

FAMILY MATTERS By Marc Garlett


RECLAIM YOUR ROLE 
AS YOUR CHILD’S 
PRIMARY INFLUENCE—
PART 2

Last week, I discussed how a lack of intimacy 
in the parent-child relationship has led kids 
to bond more intensely with their peers. Here, 
I’ll look at the devastating effects these peer-
centered relationships can have, and how parents 
can reclaim their role as the chief-orienting 
influence in their children’s lives. 

The crisis of the young

 For evidence of just how unhealthy it can be 
when a child’s relationship with his or her peers 
matters more than the one they have with their 
parents, Maté points to the dramatic rise in 
violence, suicide, and mass shootings among 
today’s youth. 

 Maté found that in the vast majority of 
childhood suicides, the key trigger was how the 
children were treated by their peers, not their 
parents. When kids consider acceptance from 
their peers as their primary source of fulfillment, 
rejection and bullying can be utterly Earth-
shattering.

 “The more peers matter,” says Maté, “the 
more children are devastated by the insensitive 
relating of their peers, by failing to fit in, by 
perceived rejection or ostracization.”

The missing element

Outside of the obvious reasons why peers make 
terrible parenting substitutes, the crucial element 
missing from peer relationships is unconditional 
love. 

 Unconditional love is the most potent force 
in the parent-child bond, laying the foundation 
for the relationship’s strength, intimacy, and 
influence. Without unconditional love, the 
parenting relationship becomes no different 
than any other.

 Maté notes that some of today’s common 
disciplinary techniques can unintentionally 
signal to the child that parental love is only 
available if certain conditions are met. As an 
example, Maté explains how putting a child 
who’s throwing a tantrum into timeout can 
make it feel like the parent’s attention and love 
are merely conditional.

 “Timeout withdraws your relationship 
from the child,” says Maté. “They learn 
they’re only acceptable to you if they please 
you. The relationship is seen as unstable and 
unreliable because it’s showing them you’re not 
available for them when they’re most upset.” 
Maté says that any behavior or action by 
the parent that threatens to undermine the 
unconditional nature of the parent-child 
relationship can be harmful. Without the 
underlying trust that their parents will be there 
for them no matter what, a children’s primary 
source of safety and trust becomes a source of 
insecurity. 

Reclaim your influence

 “Our challenge as parents is to provide an 
invitation that’s too desirable to turn down, a 
loving acceptance that no peer can provide,” says 
Maté.

 “A real relationship with kids doesn’t depend 
on words; it depends on the capacity to be with 
them,” says Maté. “Welcome their presence 
with your body language and energy. Express 
delight in the child’s very being.” And your most 
challenging job as a parent is to do this even 
when they are pushing your every button, as all 
kids inevitably do.

 No matter how your children are behaving, 
consider a way to show them that they’re 
loved and accepted unconditionally. This may 
go against everything you learned from your 
parents but consider doing it anyway. And if you 
find this difficult, take Mate’s advice and think 
back about what you would’ve really wanted 
from your own parents in such a situation.

 “The ultimate gift is to make a child feel 
invited to exist in your presence exactly as he 
or she is at the moment,” says Maté. “Children 
must know they’re wanted, special, valued, 
appreciated, and enjoyed. For children to fully 
receive this invitation, it needs to be genuine and 
unconditional.”

 When children get this level of acceptance, 
they naturally desire to become closer with 
whomever is offering it. Rather than fearing 
or being threatened by their parents, children 
want to be with them. They want to follow them. 
Dedicated to empowering your family, 
building your wealth and defining your legacy,

A local attorney and father, Marc Garlett is on a 
mission to help parents protect what they love most. 
His office is located at 55 Auburn Avenue, Sierra 
Madre, CA 91024. Schedule an appointment to 
sit down and talk about ensuring a legacy of love 
and financial security for your family by calling 
626.355.4000 or visit www.GarlettLaw.com for 
more information.


Prairie Fires: The American 
Dreams of Laura Ingalls Wilder 
by Caroline Fraser 

This Pulitzer Price Winner is the first 
comprehensive historical biography 
of Laura Ingalls Wilder, the beloved 
author of the Little House on the 
Prairie books. Millions of readers of 
Little House on the Prairie believe 
they know Laura Ingalls the pioneer 
girl who survived blizzards and near-
starvation on the Great Plains, and 
the woman who wrote the famous 
autobiographical books. But the true 
saga of her life has never been fully 
told. Now, drawing on unpublished 
manuscripts, letters, diaries, and land 
and financial records, Caroline Fraser 
the editor of the Library of America 
edition of the Little House series 
masterfully fills in the gaps in Wilder’s 
biography. Revealing the grown-up 
story behind the most influential 
childhood epic of pioneer life, she 
also chronicles Wilder’s tumultuous 
relationship with her journalist 
daughter, Rose Wilder Lane, setting 
the record straight regarding charges of 
ghostwriting that have swirled around 
the books. The Little House books, 
for all the hardships they describe, are 
paeans to the pioneer spirit, portraying 
it as triumphant against all odds. But 
Wilder’s real life was harder and grittier 
than that, a story of relentless struggle, 
rootlessness, and poverty. It was 
only in her sixties, after losing nearly 
everything in the Great Depression, 
that she turned to children’s books, 
recasting her hardscrabble childhood 
as a celebratory vision of homesteading 
and achieving fame and fortune in the 
process, in one of the most astonishing 
rags-to-riches episodes in American 
letters. Spanning nearly a century of 
epochal change, from the Indian Wars 
to the Dust Bowl, Wilder’s dramatic 
life provides a unique perspective on American 
history and our national mythology of self-reliance. 
With fresh insights and new discoveries, Prairie Fires 
reveals the complex woman whose classic stories grip 
us to this day. 

The Cooking Gene: A Journey Through 
African American Culinary History in the Old 
South by Michael W. Twitty 

2018 James Beard Foundation Book of the Year. 
A renowned culinary historian offers a fresh 
perspective on our most divisive cultural issue, race, 
in this illuminating memoir of Southern cuisine and 
food culture that traces his ancestry—both black and 
white—through food, from Africa to America and 
slavery to freedom. Southern food is integral to the 
American culinary tradition, yet the question of who 
“owns” it is one of the most provocative touch points 
in our ongoing struggles over race. In 
this unique memoir, culinary historian 
Michael W. Twitty takes readers to the 
white-hot center of this fight, tracing 
the roots of his own family and the 
charged politics surrounding the 
origins of soul food, barbecue, and all 
Southern cuisine. From the tobacco 
and rice farms of colonial times to 
plantation kitchens and backbreaking 
cotton fields, Twitty tells his family 
story through the foods that enabled 
his ancestors’ survival across three 
centuries. He sifts through stories, 
recipes, genetic tests, and historical 
documents, and travels from Civil War 
battlefields in Virginia to synagogues 
in Alabama to Black-owned organic 
farms in Georgia. As he takes us 
through his ancestral culinary history, 
Twitty suggests that healing may come 
from embracing the discomfort of 
the Southern past. Along the way, he 
reveals a truth that is more than skin 
deep—the power that food has to bring 
the kin of the enslaved and their former 
slaveholders to the table, where they 
can discover the real America together. 

The Bone Mother by David 
Demchuk 

Three neighbouring villages on the 
Ukrainian/Romanian border are the 
final refuge for the last of the mythical 
creatures of Eastern Europe. Now, on 
the eve of the war that may eradicate 
their kind and with the ruthless Night 
Police descending upon their sanctuary 
they tell their stories and confront their 
destinies:The Rusalka, the beautiful 
vengeful water spirit who lives in lakes 
and ponds and lures men and children 
to their deaths;The Vovkulaka, who 
changes from her human form into 
that of a wolf and hides with her kind 
deep in the densest forests;The Strigoi, 
a revenant who feasts on blood and 
twists the minds of those who love, serve and shelter 
him;The Dvoynik, an apparition that impersonates 
its victim and draws him into a web of evil in order 
to free itself;And the Bone Mother, a skeletal crone 
with iron teeth who lurks in her house in the heart 
of the woods, and cooks and eats those who fail her 
vexing challenges. Eerie and unsettling like the best 
fairy tales, these incisor-sharp portraits of ghosts, 
witches, sirens, and seers and the mortals who 
live at their side and in their thrall will chill your 
marrow and tear at your heart.”Demchuk gracefully 
pieces together a dark and shining mosaic of a story 
with unforgettable imagery and elegant, evocative 
prose. These stories read like beautiful and brutal 
nightmares, sharply disquieting, and are made all 
the more terrifying by the history in which they’re 
grounded.”Publishers Weekly.The 3 reviews are 
from Amazon.com 


THE MISSING PAGE

Real Life Tips from LIfe's Instruction Manual

LEGAL NOTICES


LOVING COMMUNICATION

- Speak a Word of Praise 

NOTICE OF PETITION TO ADMINISTER ESTATE 
OF:
RAY HAGEMU OBAZAWA AKA RAY H. OBAZAWA 
AKA RAY OBAZAWA

CASE NO. 18STPB11665

To all heirs, beneficiaries, creditors, contingent creditors, 
and persons who may otherwise be interested in the WILL or 
estate, or both of RAY HAGEMU OBAZAWA AKA RAY 
H. OBAZAWA AKA RAY OBAZAWA.

A PETITION FOR PROBATE has been filed by SUSAN S. 
BERTEAUX in the Superior Court of California, County of 
LOS ANGELES.

THE PETITION FOR PROBATE requests that SUSAN 
S. BERTEAUX be appointed as personal representative to 
administer the estate of the decedent.

THE PETITION requests the decedent’s WILL and codicils, 
if any, be admitted to probate. The WILL and any codicils 
are available for examination in the file kept by the court. 

THE PETITION requests authority to administer the estate 
under the Independent Administration of Estates Act . (This 
authority will 

allow the personal representative to take many actions 
without obtaining court approval. Before taking certain very 
important actions, however, the personal representative will 
be required to give notice to interested persons unless they 
have waived notice or consented to the proposed action.) 
The independent administration authority will be granted 
unless an interested person files an objection to the petition 
and shows good cause why the court should not grant the 
authority.

A HEARING on the petition will be held in this court as 
follows: 03/14/19 at 8:30AM in Dept. 11 located at 111 N. 
HILL ST., LOS ANGELES, CA 90012

IF YOU OBJECT to the granting of the petition, you should 
appear at the hearing and state your objections or file written 
objections with the court before the hearing. Your appearance 
may be in person or by your attorney.

IF YOU ARE A CREDITOR or a contingent creditor of the 
decedent, you must file your claim with the court and mail 
a copy to the personal representative appointed by the court 
within the later of either (1) four months from the date of first 
issuance of letters to a general personal 

representative, as defined in section 58(b) of the California 
Probate Code, or (2) 60 days from the date of mailing or 
personal delivery to you of a notice under section 9052 of the 
California Probate Code. 

Other California statutes and legal authority may affect your 
rights as a creditor. You may want to consult with an attorney 
knowledgeable in California law.

YOU MAY EXAMINE the file kept by the court. If you are 
a person interested in the estate, you may file with the court a 
Request for Special Notice (form DE-154) of the filing of an 
inventory and appraisal of estate assets or of any petition or 
account as provided in Probate Code section 1250. A Request 
for Special Notice form is available from the court clerk.

Attorney for Petitioner

FRED D. SOLDWEDEL 

SBN 149826

ATTORNEY AT LAW

301 E COLORADO BLVD. STE 320

PASADENA CA 91101

2/2, 2/9, 2/16/19

CNS-3216965#

February is known 
as the month of love 
all over the world. 
According to legend, 
the Roman priest Saint 
Valentine be-came 
associated with this 
love-focused holiday 
because he performed 
weddings for soldiers that were forbidden to marry pursuant 
to Roman law. There was an emperor that believed that 
married soldiers were poor warriors. 

 In the Bible, there are over 600 commandments and the 
primary admonishment is to love. We came to the planet to 
feel and express love, it is healing and transformative. Last 
week I wrote about the power of being a good listener and 
training ourselves to hear, rather than waiting for our turn to 
speak. With this active listening, we come close to giving the 
gift of being understood. 

 What else can we do to celebrate our friends and loved 
ones? 

How about speaking a word of praise? 

When was the last time you thought about the qualities that 
you love most in your beloved? Unfortunately, we have been 
trained to focus on negativity. Criticism and complaints 
are destructive to our relationships. This week, let’s rewire 
ourselves to focus on the positive. Practice seeing the good in 
the people that you love. 

 Try to smile when your children enter the room. Rather 
than complaining that they have worn a hole in their pants, 
ask if they had a good day? Imagine them playing, enjoying 
their friends, and having a good time. Don’t mentally look 
for what’s wrong and pick at your kids. 

 Stop complaining to or about your sweetheart. This week 
let’s turn up the volume on praise. 

 Praise and acknowledgment is another way that we feel 
love. 

 Turn up the dial on your ability to presence love by 
speaking words of praise and acknowledgment. Create a new 
pattern of behavior by BE-ing love. 

Speak a word of praise. 

 This week try this: Everyday before you go to sleep, write 
down five things that you appreciate in your beloved. It can 
be simple as their smile or laugh. It can be how they help 
with emptying the litter box, even though they don’t like cats. 
Doing this exercise will help you to rewire your brain to focus 
on the positive aspects of your beloved. You will feel better, 
and that will have a positive impact on your relationship. 

 Practice saying something kind each day to your loved 
ones. Tell them what you love about them, it will lift their 
spirits and boost their self-esteem. They will feel good in your 
presence, and you will feel good too. 

Lift love and be love. 

 Lori Harris is a Life Mastery Consultant and coach. 
She helps her clients gain clarity and achieve the life 
transformations they desire in health, relationships, creativity, 
and vocation. Learn more about her at LoriAHarris.com or 
on her free app Gratitude Train app, an electronic journal, 
available in the App Store and Google Play.

NOTICE OF PETITION TO ADMINISTER ESTATE 
OF JANICE ELAINE ALCORN

Case No. 19STPB01078

 To all heirs, beneficiaries, creditors, contingent 
creditors, and persons who may otherwise be interested in 
the will or estate, or both, of JANICE ELAINE ALCORN

 A PETITION FOR PROBATE has been filed by 
James W. Rider in the Superior Court of California, County 
of LOS ANGELES.

 THE PETITION FOR PROBATE requests that 
James W. Rider and James E. Munson be appointed as personal 
representative to administer the estate of the decedent.

 THE PETITION requests the decedent’s will and 
codicils, if any, be admitted to probate. The will and any 
codicils are available for examination in the file kept by the 
court.

 THE PETITION requests authority to administer 
the estate under the Independent Administration of Estates 
Act. (This authority will allow the personal representative to 
take many actions without obtaining court approval. Before 
taking certain very important actions, however, the personal 
representative will be required to give notice to interested 
persons unless they have waived notice or consented to the 
proposed action.) The independent administration authority 
will be granted unless an interested person files an objection 
to the petition and shows good cause why the court should 
not grant the authority.

 A HEARING on the petition will be held on March 
7, 2019 at 8:30 AM in Dept. No. 5 located at 111 N. Hill St., 
Los Angeles, CA 90012.

 IF YOU OBJECT to the granting of the petition, 
you should appear at the hearing and state your objections or 
file written objections with the court before the hearing. Your 
appearance may be in person or by your attorney.

 IF YOU ARE A CREDITOR or a contingent creditor 
of the decedent, you must file your claim with the court 
and mail a copy to the personal representative appointed by 
the court within the later of either (1) four months from the 
date of first issuance of letters to a general personal representative, 
as defined in section 58(b) of the California Probate 
Code, or (2) 60 days from the date of mailing or personal delivery 
to you of a notice under section 9052 of the California 
Probate Code.

 Other California statutes and legal authority may 
affect your rights as a creditor. You may want to consult with 
an attorney knowledgeable in California law.

 YOU MAY EXAMINE the file kept by the court. 
If you are a person interested in the estate, you may file with 
the court a Request for Special Notice (form DE-154) of the 
filing of an inventory and appraisal of estate assets or of any 
petition or account as provided in Probate Code section 1250. 
A Request for Special Notice form is available from the court 
clerk.

Attorney for petitioner:

DARRELL G BROOKE ESQ

SBN 118071

THE BROOKE LAW GROUP PC

525 S MYRTLE AVE

STE 204

MONROVIA CA 91016

CN957539 ALCORN 

Feb 16,23, Mar 2, 2019

 
STARTING A NEW BUSINESS ? 
FILE YOUR DBA HERE 
Doing Business As, 
Fictitious Business Name Filing 
Obtain Street Address - Business Stationary - Flyers 
Rubber Stamps - Business Cards - Mailing Service 
80 W. Sierra Madre Blvd., Sierra Madre 
626-836-6675 
NOTICE OF LIEN SALE AT PUBLIC AUCTION 

Notice is hereby given that personal property in the following units will be sold at public auction on February 26, 2019 at 
or after 10:00 am pursuant to the California Self-Storage Facility Act. The sale will be conducted at: California Suites and 
Self-Storages Spaces: 2600 S. California Avenue Monrovia, CA 91016. The items to be sold are generally described as 
follows: clothing, furniture, and/or other household items stored by the follow persons: Name/Unit Number: Gloria Silvas 
M-27 Auctioneer: TF & TB, LP

Mountain Views News

Feb. 16, 23, 2019

Mountain Views News 80 W Sierra Madre Blvd. No. 327 Sierra Madre, Ca. 91024 Office: 626.355.2737 Fax: 626.609.3285 Email: editor@mtnviewsnews.com Website: www.mtnviewsnews.com