Mountain View News Saturday, January 21, 2023
CHRISTOPHER Nyerges
“CATRICK SWAYZE”
REVIEWING MY LIFE
[Nyerges is an educator and author.
He’s written such books
as “Urban Survival Guide,”
“Ex-treme Simplicity,” and others.
Information about books
and classes is available at www.
SchoolofSelf-Reliance.com]
In my mid-20s, I was introduced to a different
way to commemorate my birthday. My mentor,
R.E. White, devised something he called
The Birthday Run. The essence of this practice
was to run a lap for every year and to attempt
to recall the significant details of that year while
running. I have done this run nearly every year
on my birthday since my mid-20s, except a few
cases when I was very sick, and then I did it a few
days later.
R.E.White introduced this practice to the members
of the non-profit he founded, and most –
but not all – of the members routinely did this.
Some told me that it was too hard, or that it was
actually bad for their bodies to do so much running.
I never argued with any-one about it, but
I continued to do it myself because I found personal
value in the deeply introspective act of a
life review.
The Birthday Run concept is more than just the
run. When fully observed, it involved friends
and family, a meal together, a special “memory
bath” for the birthday person, and a sharing of
goals for the future, and significant memories
from the run. Today, I am only sharing some
significant memories from my recent run and
some action I took.
I usually prepare for this run by writing out every
year in a small notebook, and then the age I
would turn that year, and what grade I was in,
and other significant milestones through my
past nearly 7 decades. Whereas I usually see a
lot of details each year when running, this year
I noticed patterns. And behind those patterns,
I noticed motivations, both good and bad, for
many of my life’s choices.
I realized that people came into and out of my
life. There was my natal family, of course, and
I found myself feeling the most profound deep
appreciation for all that my parents did, mostly
without any thanks. And then I saw the many
close friends, male and female, that came into
my life. Often, it was as if they suddenly appeared
and were automatically apart of whatever
inner circle I had. I realized that try as I might to
“make friends,” friends always appeared, rather
organically, and became a part of my life, and
they were not usually the people I was trying to
make friends with. Even serious relationships
al-ways seemed to arise organically, without my
trying, and I have concluded that – some-how –
those people were intended to, or destined to, be
a part of my life and whatever my life was about.
Much of what I did in my life was the quest
for money and the quest for love, or whatever I
thought was “love.” But I insisted in my early
years that at least my pursuits for “money”
should provide fulfilment in the moment, not
just in the distant long-term. I learned to en-joy
every learning experience for its own immediate
values, and I learned to enjoy all the diverse jobs
that I held for the sheer pleasure of working, and
for the inherent lessons that each job provided.
quit jobs even when I needed the money because
I felt that I was wasting my life, that I was dying
inside. Yet, I still pursued endless jobs of many
sorts, because money is as important as oxygen
in our society. And I always wanted to enjoy
the process, and have the process of “working for
money” be an activity that broadly benefits me.
So, in my broad perspective of things during this
year’s run, I saw nearly everything in terms of
relationships, love, money, and the fulfillment of
character. It was quite an in-sight.
And one more thing. Each year when I review
my life during the run, I look for anything that
I’d done wrong but did not make amends for it.
In past years, I went back to some-one I’d stolen
money from and repaid them. I would call
someone and apologize for some past deed, usually
to have them say they have no memory of it.
This year, I had been re-calling the time when I
was about 14 when I stole bags of cement from a
neighbor’s gar-age, and hauled the cement via a
wagon to a friend’s backyard where we planned
to build a “clubhouse.” The clubhouse was a disaster,
and though I know the neighbor realized
I stole the cement, I never suffered any consequences
and never repaid the theft. I finally decided
to make good on that old debt. There are a
lot of funny, and sad, details – and I wrote about
that episode in my book “Watermelon Dreams”
(available from Amazon).
So after my run this year, I drove over to the
house where I’d stolen the cement. I was going
to give the current owner a $50 gift card from
Home Depot. I stood in front of the door, gift
card in hand, rehearsing the story I would tell
the surprised homeowner. I ex-pected them to
laugh, or to say that I don’t owe them anything.
These things are harder than you can imagine!
So I knocked, and knocked again. Nothing. No
one was home. I then wrote the most concise
note possible, slipped the note and gift card into
an envelope, and slipped it into the mail box.
Done. Very anticlimactic, but now that particular
debt will not plague me at night. An anchor
pulled up, no more karma to suffer in hell from
that childhood act of pointless thievery.
I’ve only shared this with a few people, but the
responses were quite varied. One old friend applauded
me for trying to make amends for my
past. Another scoffed, wondering why I was
wasting my time on “little things” when there
are so many great problems in the world. I simply
smiled, and said that I was in no position
to deal with world problems if I do not handle
myself first. Another more analytical friend
was quiet for a moment, and then said, “Do you
think $50 really handled your debt? I mean, that
was, what, more than 50 years ago? What about
interest, and penalty?” I thought about that. He
might be right…
Anyway, that’s what I did for my birthday. And
I offer profound thanks to the one friend who
encouraged me, and assisted me, in making
amends for this old theft.
As I did my life-review, I began to ponder the
core values that push each of us to strive to earn
income, and I realized that too many of “us”
have no core values except sheer sur-vival, and
the pursuit of pleasure. That’s not necessarily
a bad thing, but I always wanted more. I often
ANSWERS TO QUESTIONS
ABOUT YOUR PETS
As a relatively new dog dad, I have many questions daily
about why my Labrador, Thurber, does some of the many
funny things he and other pets do. To that end, I have begun
doing a lot of research and am posting my findings at ThurbersTail.com. This column summarizes
recent discoveries.
Dear Tom: Why does my dog
love sticks so much? – Stuck in Peoria
Dear Stuck, different sticks have different tastes, textures and smells, which are real gastronomic
delights to our canine-crunching companions. Note that sticks can be dangerous to
your pup — they can splinter and cause cuts and you certainly don’t want your pup eating
splinters — so it’s best to replace your dog’s preferred stick with a safer chewable alternative.
Dear Tom: What is the difference between a pet crocodile and a pet alligator? – Flustered
in Florida
Dear Flustered, such reptiles do not make good pets for a number of rea-sons and you
should know that in many states it is illegal to keep them as pets. That said, the primary
difference between a crocodile and an alliga-tor is that you’ll “see one in a while” and you’ll
“see the other later.”
Dear Tom: My puppy seems to hiccup a lot. Is this normal? – Worried in Wisconsin
Dear Worried: It’s entirely normal for puppies to have hiccups from over-excitement or eating
and drinking too fast. To reduce hiccups, give your puppy smaller portions to eat, plenty
of water to drink and regular exer-cise. In time, your puppy will outgrow the hiccupping
habit. However, if the hiccups are excessive and seem to never end, be sure to consult your
veterinarian.
Dear Tom: My wife and I have taken in many stray dogs over the years. We just took in a
large mixed-breed, but we are puzzled by his excessive shedding, his rock-hard paws and his
preference for eating hay. – Harried in Houston
Dear Harried, thank you for being kind to our canines in need, but you’ve made a common
mistake. Your “dog” is a Shetland Pony.
Dear Tom: My boyfriend doesn’t like dogs and gave me an ultimatum: Either I get rid of
my beloved Fluffy or he will leave me. My question is, where can Fluffy and I get a better
boyfriend? – Conflicted in California
Dear Conflicted, let Fluffy choose your next boyfriend at the dog park or somewhere else
where wonderful people — people who love pets — congregate!
Dear Tom: I am burned out on politics and all the anger in our world. What can I do to
overcome my depression? – Down in Delaware
Dear Down: One of the best solutions for your woes is to get a pet. The companionship and
pure joy of having a dog share life with you is incredibly beneficial. Several studies show
this. If you are able to spare the time to love and care for a pet, the love, joy and laughter
you receive back will be 10 times greater than whatever you give to your furry friend. Note:
With the economy down, more people have turned their pets back into shelters, so start
your search there! Good luck!
Send your pet-related questions to Tom at Tom@TomPurcell.com.
Visit ThurbersTail.com for well-researched articles on why pets do what they do, as well as
funny pet videos.
him. He gets along fine with
other cats. Can this sweet baby have a new furriend in his
forever home? Born 4/7/22.
He is being fostered by Gabbi, at (626)808-8557, whom you may call for more info. See more pictures
and 2 videos of Catrick on our website’s “More Cats” page.
Topaz is more than a gem of a dog- she’s a shining star!
Pet of the Week
Four- year-old Topaz was found in a local park. She was
initially very withdrawn at the shelter, but now she has
started to come out of her shell, much to the delight of staff
and volunteers.
Her nervousness has been replaced by an adorable mixture
of curiosity and affection. She loves gentle scratches and
pets and has also shown an affinity for training. She is a
master at “sit” and “down” and much more she just hasn’t
shown off yet.
This wallflower may need some time to warm up in a
home, but once she does, this lady is sure to be a jewel!
Topaz is available for a 14-day adoption trial! This is a
great opportunity to see if she’s the right fit for your home.
The adoption fee for dogs is $150. All dog adoptions
include spay or neuter, microchip, and age-appropriate
vaccines.
New adopters will receive a complimentary health-and-wellness exam from VCA Animal
Hospitals, as well as a goody bag filled with information about how to care for your pet.
View photos of adoptable pets and schedule an adoption appointment at pasadenahumane.
org.
Adoptions are by appointment only, and new adoption appointments are available every
Sunday and Wednesday at 10:00 a.m. Pets may not be available for adoption and cannot
be held for potential adopters by phone calls or email.
This beautiful, sweet boy, age
10 months, is a buff colored
tabby. Catrick showed his
friendly side immediately after
being rescued! He likes to
snuggle in bed with you and
starts to purr and knead with
his paws as soon as you pet
Mountain Views News 80 W Sierra Madre Blvd. No. 327 Sierra Madre, Ca. 91024 Office: 626.355.2737 Fax: 626.609.3285
Email: editor@mtnviewsnews.com Website: www.mtnviewsnews.com
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