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More News and Such
Mountain Views News Saturday, April 23, 2011
REAL COMPUTERIZED DATING
HOW TO MAKE
YOUR OWN
NICOTINE-FREE
SMOKING MIXES
by Christopher Nyerges
Have you ever had to fill out some
sort of form, maybe for a job or some
sort of poll, and they want to know
if you are a smoker? I always check
“no.” I am not a smoker, and always
sit in the no-smoking sections of
restaurants. (Well, I used to anyway,
back when you could smoke in
restaurants). I have long maintained
that the real culprit in commercial
cigarettes are the chemicals added to
the tobacco and paper, things such as
moisturizers, flavors, things to keep
the cigarette burning, etc. etc. There
are anywhere from 70 to 250 such
chemicals, depending on who you
believe. If the tobacco companies
had to list all the ingredients on the
label, there’d be no room on cigarette
containers.
Let’s just assume that “the
government,” in its ultimate wisdom
of knowing what is best for us,
decided to put all the tobacco
companies out of business and you
could no longer buy tobacco at
your corner market. Guess what?
Various species of tobacco grow wild
throughout the country.
All that said, though I have
smoked tobaccos in the past
(commercial and wild), today I
prefer to make my own non-nicotine
smoking mixes for those times
when I sit out back and think about
important things.
My blend varies from season to
season, depending on what wild
leaves I have picked and dried.
The blend will typically have some
dried peppermint and/or white sage
(Salvia apiana). This gives a sweet
flavor to the smoke, somewhat like
menthol in cigarettes. Any of the
sages and mints would do -- even
those growing in your garden. This
should be no more than 1/5 of your
blend.
Horehound (Marrubium vulgare)
is a European medicinal herb that
can now be found throughout most
of North America and the world. It
has a long history of use for treating
coughs and sore throats when used
as a hot tea or candy. I learned
recently that it can also be blended
into your smoking mixes and there
still may be some good effect from
the horehound, even if you smoke
it. It is a true mint, after all, and it
smokes well, though it doesn’t add
that menthol-like quality to your
smoking mix as do the other mints.
I often add dried manzanita leaves
(Arcostaphylos sps.), which were
used by American Indians of the
Southwest in their smoking blends.
This smokes very well, though there
is little taste or flavor. The most
commonly known variety is the
kinnikinnik, or Arcostaphylos uva-
ursi, which is not a bush or tree like
the other manzanitas but is a trailing
vine. Regardless which variety I use, I
let them air dry, and then crush them
into small pieces. The manzanita
leaves are all somewhat tough and
leathery so it will be necessary to
break them into small bits so they can
smoke. I have heard that the flavor
of this particular leaf is improved a
bit if it is aged, and if it is allowed
to slightly ferment, in much the
same way that one might age certain
tobaccos. However, I have never
taken the time to experiment with
this, since the dried and crumbled
leaves smoke quite well.
I sometimes add dried and
pulverized willow bark (Salix sps.),
usually red or arroyo willow. This
adds a pleasant flavor, and was
apparently used in traditional
American Indian smoking blends. A
tea from the willow bark has effects
similar to aspirin, and can be drunk
or applied to wounds to relieve pain.
In fact, the original aspirin came
from the inner bark of willows, which
contains salicin. We have heard some
folks say that smoking the willow
bark in their mixes also provides
some pain-relieving qualities. That’s
not been my experience, but you can
try it and see what you experience.
I add the dried leaves of mullein.
Mullein (Verbascum thapsus) is now
a common weed in the U.S., though
it’s a European native. Of the many
virtues of mullein, it is good in a
tea for breathing problems, even
asthma. Interestingly, mullein has
long been smoked to improve the
breathing passages. If you’re going
to smoke, you really ought to include
mullein in your mix. The large
leaves of mullein have the texture of
flannel. I generally pick leaves from
the first year growth. Mullein lives
for two years, and in the second year
it sends up a tall flower spike and
produces smaller leaves. (By the way,
these fresh leaves make pretty good
toilet paper). Mullein is common
throughout the country in fields and
along streams.
I usually add a little bit of mugwort
to my mix -- no more than about
1/5 of the mix -- since it produces a
very pleasant aroma when burned.
Mugwort (Artemisia sps.) is found
along streams and the dried leaves,
rolled into a cigar shape, were
used by early Native American in
Southern California as punks for
transporting coals. When I collect
mugwort for smoking, I typically
just collect the leaves from the lower
stalk of the plant that have dried
on the plant. On the other hand, if
I am collecting the leaves for their
medicinal values, I would collect the
leaves green, clean them, and then
dry them for storage.
There are other herbs that I
sometimes add in various amounts.
I like the leaves of passionflower
(Passiflora sps.), a somewhat
common vining plant throughout
much of the west, the south, Europe,
Mexico, and even the Hawaiian
islands. The leaves have a sweet odor
and don’t seem to irritate the throat
or mouth. Medicinally, the tea from
passionflower is drunk in cases
of insomnia or nervousness. The
flowers are used medicinally also,
but I usually only smoke the leaves.
I also add a small amount of
Damiana leaves to the blend which I
buy from the health food store. This
is a plant which supposedly grows in
the wild around, but it is a plant I do
not know and haven’t encountered it.
It makes a delicious tea, and a very
pleasant smoke. Damiana leaves were
also smoked by the ancient Aztecs. I
have long enjoyed the fragrance of
the damiana tea, and it does create a
pleasant aroma when smoked.
When I have it, I add a few
pulverized pieces of sweetgrass
braids to the smoking blend.
Yerba Santa (Eriodictyon sps.)
is a common southwestern herb
found in dry and desert-like places.
It is very fragrant, and usually
sticky. There are several varieties,
and all have a history of being used
as a tea for breathing and bronchial
problems. It is sometimes added
to smoking mixes for its fragrance,
and apparently because some folks
believe that the beneficial effects on
the lungs and bronchial tract still
carryover when you smoke it.
Interestingly, you’ll notice that
many of the herbs I have listed are
frequently used as the primary
remedy for coughs, sore throats,
asthmatic conditions, etc. At the very
least, there is the presumption that
by smoking herbs that are generally
beneficial to the throat and lungs,
you will be somewhat counteracting
the harmful effects of the smoke.
Whether this has any real scientific
basis is uncertain.
Coltsfoot is an herb commonly
found along roadside ditches and
wet areas in the eastern parts of the
United States. It is a two year plant,
and the large first year leaves are the
ones typically gathered for smoking.
Coltsfoot has been used as a smoke
for at least a few centuries, and there
is the belief that it can actually be
good for a sore throat to smoke
some.
You can make your own blends
and determine what you like.
I don’t smoke a lot – I might sit
out back maybe once a month or
so and smoke my hand-made elder
pipe. I’m not addicted to it, like
the person who can’t stop chain
smoking commercial cigarettes. I
simply likes to smoke occasionally, at
special times, while thinking about a
particular subject.
I am quick to reiterate that I am
neither encouraging nor endorsing
smoking of any sort. I certainly
do not advocate the use of regular
commercial tobacco, since its use
is related to a host of diseases. But
perhaps the use of wild nicotine-free
herbs can help you cut down on the
harmful tobacco. If you do choose to
smoke, moderation is the key.
If you want to try some of these
smoking mixes, but have no desire
to collect the herbs yourself in
the wild, you can purchase small
amounts by going to Store at www.
ChristopherNyerges.com
[Nyerges is the author of “How
To Survive Anywhere.” He can be
reached at Box 41834, Eagle Rock, CA
90041, or www.ChristopherNyerges.
com]
RICH Johnson
Last year a
friend of mine upgraded
from GirlFriend 1.0 to
Wife 1.0. He quickly
discovered Wife 1.0
took up a lot more
memory than GirlFriend
1.0. Additionally, Wife
1.0 installs a security
subroutine that constantly monitors all other
computer activities. My friend is finding
that some applications such as PokerNight
10.3, BeerBash 2.5, and PubNight 7.0 are no
longer able to run through the system at all,
crashing the system when selected (even
though they always worked fine before).
My friend also cautioned that Wife 1.0
automatically installs undesired plug-
ins such as MotherInLaw 55.8, and
BrotherInLaw Beta Release. The manual
also warns users that any attempt to
uninstall Wife 1.0 will result in a total
computer crash and complete loss of
memory cache. He has recommended to
the software manufacturer that in Wife 2.0
they add a “don’t remind me again” button,
and a “minimize” button.
My other close friend decided to avoid
all of the headaches associated with Wife
1.0 by sticking with Girlfriend 2.0. Even
there, my friend found many problems.
Apparently you cannot install Girlfriend
2.0 on top of Girlfriend 1.0. You must
uninstall Girlfriend 1.0 first. User blogs say
this is a long-standing bug of which users
should be aware. Another problem with all
versions of Girlfriend is continuous popup
annoying messages about the advantages of
upgrading to Wife 1.0.
BUG ALERT: Wife 1.0 has an
undocumented bug. If you try to install
Mistress 1.1 before uninstalling Wife 1.0,
Wife 1.0 will delete MSMoney or Quickbook
files before doing the uninstall itself. Then
Mistress 1.1 will refuse to install, claiming
insufficient resources.
My good friend Mary from Starbucks
sent me a link to an extraordinary website:
www.mcnaughtonart.com. Christian artist
Jon McNaughton has created beautiful
paintings of Christ in very interesting
situations. Be aware that it has a distinct
conservative flavor to it. Nevertheless the
artwork is magnificent. A lot of effort has
gone into Mr. McNaughton’s work and
whether you agree with his politics or not,
the artwork can be enjoyed.
I saw Mel Gibson’s movie “The Passion of
the Christ” this last week for the first time.
I didn’t want to see it just to see it. I wanted
to wait for the right moment. That right
moment was in the home of my friends
Chuck and Lisa. I choose to believe it was
a divine appointment to experience this
extraordinary film.
La Salle Honors Karen and John
McAlister at the 12th Annual Crystal Ball
Pasadena, CA. - La Salle High School held it’s 12th Annual Crystal Ball entitled “Behind
the Great Wall: A Night of Mystery and Wonder,” on April 15 at the Langham Huntington
Hotel and Spa in Pasadena. The 2011 honorees and recipients of the Lasallian Volunteer
of the Year Award were Mr. and Mrs. John McAlister P’08,’11,’14.
Our silent auction was held in the theme decorated Langham Ballroom foyer followed
by the exciting live auction, award presentations and dinner in the beautifully decorated
ballroom. Crystal Ball Chair, Liz Kwong P’12,’14, chose the theme for a magical night in
China to share good fortune and delicious Asian delicacies in a celebration that provides
an opportunity for our community to come together and enjoy the company of friends
in an exotic setting, as well as support the programs and activities La Salle High School
provides for its students.
The Crystal Ball is La Salle’s largest fundraiser of the year, with proceeds from the evening
supporting our academic, athletic, student life, arts and financial aid programs.
These funds most significantly support the San Miguel Scholarship Program as La Salle
enrolls 5% of each entering freshman class into a need-based, tuition-free program for
low-income families.
Generosity is a universal quality that brings blessings to all, including the giver. As a
Chinese Proverb says, “If you always give, you will always have.”
La Salle Principal, Patrick Bonacci, AFSC and La Salle President, Dr. Richard
Gray flank the 2011 Lasallian Volunteer on the Year Award recipients, Karen and
John McAlister.
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