Mountain Views News          Saturday, November 23, 2013

A13

 

THE GOOD LIFE

Mountain Views-News Saturday, November 23, 2013 

SENIOR HAPPENINGS

HOW TO GET CHEAP OR FREE INTERNET ACCESS AT HOME

Dear Savvy Senior:

Can you help me find a cheap Internet service for 
my house? I’m retired and live on a fixed income, 
and the Internet service I use now is too expensive. 

Financially Squeezed

Dear Squeezed:

There are actually a number of companies that 
offer low-cost or free home Internet services, but 
what’s available to you will depend on where you live and your financial situation. Here are some options 
to check into.

Free Internet 

If you are a light Internet user and you live in their service area, free high-speed Internet is now available 
through the telecom company FreedomPop. Just go to freedompop.com and type in your address 
to find out if they serve your location. If they do, you’ll need to buy the $89 Freedom Hub Burst home 
modem that allows you to access the Internet. You simply plug it in and you’re ready to go.

FreedomPop is a non-contract service that provides 1 gigabyte (GB) of data per month for free, which 
is adequate for sending and receiving emails and surfing the web. If, however, you want more data 
for things like watching Internet videos or sharing photos you can pay $10/month for 5 GB or $18/
month for 10 GB.

 

Cheap Internet

If FreedomPop is not available in your area, there are other providers that offer high-speed Internet 
at a low cost. For example, NetZero (netzero.net, 800-638-9376) and Juno (juno.com, 888-213-9093) 
now have DSL plans for only $10 per month for the first six months with no data restrictions, provided 
you live in their service areas and you have a home phone line. After six months the price jumps 
up to $18 per month.

To search for other high-speed Internet service providers in your area, see ispprovidersinmyarea.com. 

Another strategy to get cheaper high-speed Internet is to combine, or bundle it together with your TV 
and/or phone service. Check with the television and phone providers in your area to see what types 
of bundle packages they offer.

If, however, you can’t find a high-speed service that fits your budget, and you don’t mind slower 
service, consider getting dial-up Internet. If you have a home phone line, NetZero and Juno again 
provide some very inexpensive dial-up services running $10 and $11 per month respectively.

Low Income Internet

If your income is low enough and you live in a participating state, there are also a number of programs 
that offer low-cost high-speed Internet services. One that’s most fitting for financially challenged 
seniors is CenturyLink’s Internet Basics program (centurylink.com/home/internetbasics, 866-642-
0444), which is available in 37 states. This program offers high-speed DSL Internet service for just 
$10 a month for the first year ($21/month afterwards). It also offers offer a personal computer for just 
$150 and free introductory computer classes. 

To qualify, you’ll need to show that you’re receiving certain types of government benefits, such as 
Medicaid, Food Stamps, SSI, home energy assistance or public housing assistance. Or, that your 
household income is at or below 135, 150 or 175 percent of the Federal Poverty Guidelines – it varies 
by state. 

There are other programs available that serve additional states, like Internet Essentials offered by 
Comcast (internetessentials.com) and Connect2Compete (connect2compete.org), but to be eligible 
you must have a child or grandchild who lives in your house that participates in the national school 
lunch program. Both of these programs offer Internet home service for $10/month and a $150 personal 
computer. 

Also, stay tuned for the government’s Lifeline Broadband Program that could soon be offering income-
qualified citizens across the country, high-speed home Internet services for a low cost. To find 
out more about all of these programs, visit cheapinternet.com. 

Send your senior questions to: Savvy Senior, P.O. Box 5443, Norman, OK 73070, or visit SavvySenior.
org. Jim Miller is a contributor to the NBC Today show and author of “The Savvy Senior” book.

 By Pat Birdsall

FYI: ELDERLY DRIVING: It may be time to make some significant changes

If the following list describes your driving or that of a loved one, perhaps it’s time to consider 
alternative options: (1) You have trouble recognizing or observing traffic signs and signals. You do 
not hear emergency sirens. (2) Everyone else seems to drive too fast or too slow. Others might think 
you are driving at an inappropriate speed. (3) You have had some close calls recently. For example, do 
you need more time to make driving decisions or do your decisions seem to be poor ones afterwards? 
Do you misjudge gaps in traffic? Do some cars seem to come out of nowhere and surprise you? Do 
you get honked at more? Have you had several moving violations in the last three years? (4)You have 
physical difficulty driving. For instance, do you have trouble moving your foot from the gas to the 
brake? Do you have trouble turning to look over your shoulder? Do you take medications that cause 
drowsiness, dizziness, seizures or blackouts? (5) You get angry or confused driving. For example, do 
intersections seem overwhelming with so much to watch? Do you forget how to drive to familiar 
places? And finally, do you feel exhausted after driving?

 Even though it’s a delicate topic, family members should discuss with friends and a physician 
concerns about an elder’s driving. If a loved one continues to drive despite symptoms of 
incompetent driving, there are ways to discourage or prevent him or her from driving. For instance, 
directly express your concerns and take the person for a driving test or a course that would help 
protect this friend or relative and as a last resort, arrange for other forms of transportation. There 
are also online courses offered by the Auto Club www.aaa.com or through AARP www.aarp.com 

 (www.kansashighwaypatrol.org) 

 .....................................................................................

HELPFUL HINT: Get a picture of all of your prescription bottles and keep it in your phone’s 
photo album. 

......................................................................................

FOR YOUR FUNNY BONE - A 45 year old woman had a heart attack and was 
taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience. Seeing God, she 
asked, “Is my time up?” God said, “No, you have another 43 years 2 months and 8 days to live.” Upon 
recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift, liposuction, breast implants 
and a tummy tuck. She even had someone come in and change her hair color and brighten her teeth! 
Since she had so much time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it. After her last 
operation, she was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way home, she was 
killed by an ambulance. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, “I thought you said I had another 
43 years? Why didn’t you pull me out of the path of the ambulance?” God replied, “I didn’t recognize 
you.”

 ~ ~ ~

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! … November Birthdays

Flo Mankin, Alberta Curran, Carmela Frontino, Kathy Wood, Lena Zate, Joe Pergola, 
Janice Kacer, Valerie Howard, “Mike” Ruggles, Joan Ruggles, Lois Stueck, Jean Wood, 
Shirley Yergeau, Kathi Jefferson, Pat Krok, Irene Nakagawa, Anna Ross, Mary Steinberg 
and Sue Quinn.

* To add your name to this distinguished list, please call the paper at 626.355.2737. YEAR of birth 
not required

..................................................................

Quote of the Week: On Thanksgiving Day, all over America, families sit down to dinner at 
the same moment- Halftime. ~Author Unknown

 ..................................................................

ACTIVITIES: Unless listed differently, all activities are at the Hart Park 
House (Senior Center) 222 W. Sierra Madre Blvd., Sierra Madre

 

 YMCA San Gabriel Valley Intervale Senior Café: Monday-Friday at 12:00 Noon 

(Participants are urged to arrive no later than 11:45 A.M.) 

All seniors 60 and up can take part in the lunch program. There is a suggested donation of $2.00 for 
those 60 and over and $3.75 for non-senior guests. Daily

 reservations are necessary as space is limited. 

 Please call 24 hours in advance...626.355.0256

Free Balance Class: Every 3rd Monday for 11:00 am to 11:45 am with Shannon Vandevelde. A 
variety of balance exercises are practiced; all ability levels are encouraged and welcomed. 

Free Blood Pressure Testing: Held Second Tuesday of the month from 11:00 am-12:00 pm: No 
appointment necessary.

 

Bingo: Every Tuesday afternoon from 1:00 pm- 3:00 pm Cards are only .25c each! 

Free Chair Yoga: New Hours: 11:00 to 11:45 Every Wednesday morning. Join Paul Hagen for this 
free class that focuses on senior yoga techniques. No reservation is necessary!

Free Legal Consultation: Pasadena attorney Lem Makupson volunteers on the 2nd Wednesday of 
the month. He focuses on estate planning, trusts, wills, probate, conservatorships and business law. 
*Appointments are a must! Please call: 626.355.7394 to make yours* Conflicting court schedules 
can occasionally cause cancellations.

Birthday Celebrations: The 2nd Thursday of the month the Senior Center celebrates the birthdays of 
our patrons at 12:30 pm. Please join us for free cake and ice cream and “celebration.” (The cakes are 
provided due to a generous donation from the Sierra Madre Civic Club.)

Game Day: Every Thursday at 1:00pm. Poker is usually the game of choice, or should I say chance? 
Board games and other card games are also available. Outside, on the patio, a beautiful, one-of-a-
kind chess table is anxious for players.

Free Strength Training Class: Every Friday from 1:00 pm -1:45 pm Conducted by long-time 
volunteer, Lisa Brandley. The class utilizes light weights for low-impact resistance training. Weights 
are provided by the Sierra Madre Senior Center. It’s a great way to stay in shape and to

 socialize with your peers. 

Senior Citizens Club: Every Saturday at the Hart Park House (Senior Center). Brown 
bag lunch at 11:30am; Club meeting at Noon; Bingo 12:30- 3:30 pm. Only .25c per card.

UPCOMING EXCURSIONS:

Friday, December 13, 2013. “Because it’s Christmas” 

Show at Candlelight Pavilion (Claremont, Ca.) $67.00 (Lunch included) 10:00 am- 4:00 pm

*Registering for Excursions can be done in person at the Hart Park House Senior Center and the 
Community Recreation Center or online at www.cityofsierramadre.com Cash, checks, and credit 
cards are accepted. Make checks payable “City of Sierra Madre”. Payment must be made at the time of 
reservation. CALL (626) 355-7394

 


KATIE Tse.....................This and That

WHITE SLIME --AGAIN

 Happy Thanksgiving! I hope no one minds that I’m recycling this lightly-used article 
from 2012. I figured that some (probably most) readers didn’t see my Thanksgiving 
article last year, therefore it will be new and fresh for them! For those people who 
did read my story last year, you probably don’t remember all the fascinating details. 
And even if you do recall this article, (in which case you’re probably either my Mom 
or one of her closest friends), I think the topic is still relevant. 

 One of the things I’ve enjoyed about recent Thanksgivings is the casual attitude my family and 
in-laws have developed. This means we can come wearing tee shirts and tennis shoes if we want. We 
can drink beer with the hor dourves and eat $2 Ralph’s pumpkin pie for dessert. And we’re freed from 
the bondage of turkey.

 Yes, turkey is bondage. Any dish that requires weeklong prepping or gallons of frying oil is a form of 
culinary slavery. An animal that comes with an implanted 
pop-up timer is a sure sign of freak farming. Unless you’re 
a die-hard foodie, cooking a turkey is a daunting trial you 
should only have to experience once, if at all, in a lifetime.

 I’ve never grasped why some people expend so much 
effort on a dish that typically tastes bland at best, and bland 
and dry at worst. I take that back. At worst, a colony of 
bacteria will fester in the stuffing crammed up your bird’s 
body cavity, and sicken your whole family. If you manage 
to avoid food poisoning, you’ll still most likely have a LOT 
of turkey left over. Sure, you can try to pawn it off on 
visiting relatives. “Kyle, you can take sandwiches on the 
plane back to Pittsburg.” But Kyle will counter with a sly 
comeback, “I’d love to! (Liar!) But TSA is really strict about 
what you can take on board these days.”

 So, you’re stuck with more than half of the carcass. What 
to do, what to do...? Of course there’s a plethora of recipes 
online for those experiencing turkey overload. However, 
no matter what decide upon, you’re going to have to doctor 
up the bird somehow because, let’s face it --turkey just 
doesn’t taste good on its own.

 Some good sports use up all their turkey bits in sandwiches, burritos, soups, and salads. But a lot of 
people take the easy, wasteful way out and chuck the remaining bird with the rest of the week’s trash. 
I recall an L.A. Times article stating that about a third of the turkey meat purchased in the U.S. ends 
up in the dump.

 This rampant waste is unconscionable, particularly because we’re supposed to be in the throws of 
a major economic crisis! I understand trashing the left-overs if this is your first turkey venture and 
you’ve made everyone in your family sick. Perhaps just mustering the strength, in your weakened state, 
to lug the bird to the trash is a feat in itself. In that case, you’ve done the right thing in containing the 
contamination. But if you’ve tossed multiple birds over the years, or if you just can’t stand the thought 
of eating turkey more than twice in a week, you should consider broadening your Thanksgiving main 
entrees. Try including something you either know everyone will finish or something that translates 
well into multiple meals. My family is going vegan this year -- Woo Hoo! (There’s only four of us, 
but I’m still excited!)

 It was while I was considering the great American turkey waste last year, that I had an epiphany! 
There’s so much meat thrown away, while there are so many hungry mouths to feed. Why not send 
turkey trucks into neighborhoods the Saturday after Thanksgiving to collect everyone’s discarded 
turkey meat? (Friday won’t work, because everyone’s busy killing each other at the mall or Walmart 
on Black Friday.) Collecting home-prepared turkey presents the hazard of spreading infection and 
disease. But don’t worry, I’ve accounted for that!

 Last year “Beef Inc.” shut down most of its “pink slime” factories in response to pubic outrage about 
the quality of “beef” being fed to school children and the public at large. Many of these factories 
remain dormant, silently waiting for a new protein to fill their tubes and vats.

 Behold --”White Slime!” Mechanically separated and disinfected for your dining pleasure! What 
better way to recycle everyone’s leftover turkey than to turn it into turkey nuggets, turkey sticks, and 
whatever other products Beef Inc. produced? The danger of cross contamination and other food-
borne pathogens will be corrected during the “meat’s” ammonia baths. Only it won’t be pink, it will 
be turkey-white. In the spirit of Thanksgiving, charity, and fairness, “White Slime” products should 
be donated to those in need or sold at discount prices. 

 If this humble brain child should come to fruition, it would, most likely, soon go the way of most 
successful American enterprises. It would suffer graft and corruption. Ultimately there’d be cover up 
about the dangers of whatever noxious chemicals would be used in its production. But until then, this 
creative use for the nation’s trashed turkey remains viable and untouched. Remember, when you see 
an ad for “White Slime” turkey nuggets, you read it here first!


1963 VS. 2013 (A SPAN OF ONLY 50 YEARS) 

By Bette Jones 

This should be read only by those whose level of maturity qualifies them to 
relate to it. 

1963: Long hair ... 2013: Longing for hair. 

1963: KEG ... 2013: EKG 

1963: Acid rock ... 2013: Acid reflux. 

1963: Moving to California because it’s cool ... 2013: 
Moving to Arizona because it’s warm. 

 1963: Seeds and stems ... 2013: Roughage. 

 1963: Hoping for a BMW ... 2013: Hoping for a BM. 

 1963: Going to a new, hip joint ... 2013: Receiving a new hip joint. 

 1963: Rolling Stones ... 2013: Kidney stones. 

 1963: Passing the driver’s test ... 2013: Passing the vision test. 

Each year the staff of Beloit College in Wisconsin puts together a list to give the faculty a sense of 
the mindset of the year’s incoming freshmen. Here’s this year’s list of the freshmen who were born in 
1994! 

They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up. Bottle caps have always been childproof 
and plastic. The CD was introduced three years before they were born. They have always had an 
answering machine and always had cable. They cannot fathom not having a remote control. Popcorn 
has always been cooked in a microwave. They never took a swim and thought about Jaws. They never 
heard “Where’s the beef?” or “I’d walk a mile for a Camel,” or “De plane, Boss, de plane.” They do not 
care who shot J.R. nor do they even have any idea who J.R. is. They don’t have a clue how to use a 
typewriter. (I wish I still had one. I do have an old manual Underwood that no longer works, which 
my grandson used to call “Big Mama’s old computer.”) 

Do you feel old yet?